This play is now showing at The White House Theatre to packed audiences. Starring Donald Trump as the King. Also starring Nancy (Hatchet) Pelosi and supporting cast Bernie (The Bolt) Sanders and Joe (Who) Biden. Special appearance by Hilary (Has Been) Clinton. Kim Kardashian rumoured to be lined up to take over the part of Melania Trump.

Just when you thought Trump had said all there was to be said about the coronavirus situation he goes and tops it. To refresh your memories in the beginning he suddenly banned all incoming flights to America. This was followed by the pronouncement that America would not get the virus. Therefore there was no need to take any precautions. Then there was the odd case brought in by non Americans of course but Americans could themselves travel the world. Then we were told that our troubles were our own and nothing to do with America. Then suddenly it was a crisis in America and heavy restrictions came in overnight. Out came the riot squads. It was all the fault of China of course (he may be correct here). So today as from this moment Trump bans all immigration so that will solve the problem because if you get rid of all the immigrants that will be fine (apart from the 40,000 already dead who we now ignore). And this is the man with his finger on the button.

On the home front Junior Management scored a triumph yesterday. The Red Cross parcels having arrived on Friday, yesterday Junior Management got up at 5.30.a.m. and secured another Morrisons delivery slot by 6.00.a.m. this despite there being the enormous waiting list for a slot. Presumably the rest of the country failed to get up and log on at this time on a Monday morning. Excellent initiative shown here, the sort of thing that you might have hoped for from the senior administrators (seat warmers that is, not actual front line workers who do tend to get up at this time for their shift) of the NHS and Health England in their quest for protective clothing. But no clock on at 9.00 and really by 4.30 you have done a full day.

Lets be sensible here. Given that this epidemic is worldwide there was always going to be problems with the supply of protective clothing, not just in the UK but in most countries. So do not be entirely surprised that problems occur. Next, the government may not be entirely blameless but it is not actually their job to purchase the equipment That is the job of the senior, very well paid, index linked pensioned senior administrators. It is the job of the government to provide the funds and I have not heard any suggestion that funds were withheld. Given that it is a worldwide situation you might have some sympathy for these administrators if there was any evidence that they had really got off their well padded posteriors and used their initiative. And yes perhaps Ministers should have more urgently booted them into action BUT. wait for it, the minute you ask a Senior Civil Servant to do something you are bullying them. What really nails it is their wilful refusal to engage with the Private Sector insisting on hugging it to themselves. This personified by the story of the British firm now selling protective clothing to other countries because despite repeated attempts to sell to the NHS they simply got no reply – just blanked off. Of course it may not be that simple. There could be questions of quality or price or whether they had the precise items required but the damning point is that the conversation did not even take place. When this is all over there will be very pertinent questions to be asked about the role and attitude of senior civil servants and time servers in particular.

Happy Birthday Your Majesty and well done Prince Philip with your timely message to the essential workers.