At the start of this epidemic the government told all people over 70 years of age to isolate themselves for 12 weeks. In addition people with certain conditions classed as at risk were told to do the same. Some people of course fell into both categories and were deemed to be especially vulnerable.

Being of the older age category I obeyed and at some inconvenience isolated myself as per government instructions. It is now several weeks later. Then yesterday the imbecile Hancock got into an argument with a Sunday newspaper because he did not like something they said. Why he had to squabble in an undignified manner is beyond me. This seemed to involve some tweeting – does that make Hancock a bird with a small brain? As a government minister the correct way of correcting The Fourth Estate (if you feel you have to) is to send for your Civil Servants and tell them to compose a correction statement. When presented to you tell them to go away, tear up the watered down version they have produced and come back with the more forceful version you dictated. When that arrives tell them to issue it in a statement aimed at setting the matter straight.

I digress. Hancock in the middle of his exchanges stated that people over 70 had never been instructed to self isolate. When challenged about this he repeated that he was right. The moron then produced a copy of the relevant government instruction and stated that it supported his view – only problem is the document clearly states the first class to self isolate is ALL over 70’s! And what exactly is the government position this man holds? Minister for toilet rolls? No, nothing that important he is only the minister for Health!

And then today, instead of getting on with his job he sends a crawling message to a certain Piers Morgan, who might or might not have contracted the virus (did not as it happens). Is he now going to spend his time writing messages to every sick journalist, great and small. There must be some job he can do properly. Give him a bucket and mop.

Home front news today concerns the estate equivalent of Hancock namely the cat. This creature was padding towards the stale bread and other morsels put out for the birds to consume, with the intention of eating it himself. This I presume was meant as a protest against both the quality and quantity of provisions provided by Junior Management. However he came face to face with one of the pheasants that reside in the grounds who was also heading for the food. Now you might have thought that most cats would regard a pheasant as lunch on the hoof (or claws I suppose). Not a bit of it. A stand off ensued. This was finally broken by the pheasant taking a step forward. The cat took a step back. This was repeated several times whereupon the cat decided to pretend to ignore the pheasant and turned slowly and walked away pretending the pheasant was not there, trying to retain some dignity (unsuccessful). The pheasant watched him with contempt and then ate the bread. In all fairness I should state that the pheasant also saw off with a minimum of fuss a large pigeon that fancied its chances but retired hastily minus several feathers.